Rex's Ramblings - The look

I was thinking about what a gift it was to be loved and accepted in spite of my many faults (according to my nest friends) as I neared my eighth decade on this planet, and the many times I had been called on to listen and counsel with those who were having severe problems with those who should have been the closest and dearest. Then I chided myself on the nearly 20 years of no contact with my own brother.

I can not really remember why there was such an estrangement, but I realize now how easy it was to blame him for whatever the cause was, and to await his apology so I could forgive him. As it became ever more apparent that that was an unlikely event, I remarked to my father that I was regretful about the status of his sons’ relationship. Dad gave me that look that fathers reserve for special times when they require absolute attention, “He said the same thing to me last month when he visited.”

The look Dad gave me there and then made it impossible not to accept the fact that it wasn’t fault or forgiveness that was in question, it was responsibility. If I was to use the tools supplied by my parents, I’d better exercise some. The folks used to remind all of their kids that the telephone wires ran both ways. The call was difficult to make because rejection is the most feared event in any relationship.

“Hello.” …. ”Hi. It’s me.” …. “Glad you called. I was just thinking about you.” ….

That was more than 20 years ago. The thought of what we would have missed over that time is daunting, and I can still remember that look on Dad’s face that led to a reunion. There must be some among us that need that “look” to inspire them to action…to the healing, joyous outcome of a repaired relationship that they’ve long yearned to fix. Good luck!